ENTERTAINMENT AT THE BOAT RAMP

[agnes_jack]

Heres a few of my many.
One day peak christmas, the ramp was chockers, every parking spot for at least 5-600m in either direction had a car and trailer in it.
I backed the boat in and left my mate holding it next to the ramp. It took me about 15min's to park the car and walk back to the ramp. As I approached the ramp I could see my mate waving and jumping up and down in a mad panick. When I got a bit closer I realized what he was going on about, no bung plugs!!
I raced back to the car but by the time I got back the boat was to heavy to winch back on the trailer. We had to creep the boat back on to the trailer bit by bit as the water drained.
Another funny one for the onlookers:
I was standing on the nose of my boat as a mate drove in to the ramp, as we stopped on the shore I grabbed the bowrail and flipped myself over, but the bowrail mounts let go as I was in mid air! Landed flat on the ground, much to the amuzement of the onlookers

All good fun Regards, Tony

[fsh00]

Seen a bloke coming into ramp(fiberglass boat) sitting on bow ready to jump only to get his pants caught on bowroller and hang mid air while the boat made a crunchy land fall

[Mad_Barry]

There are only 2 types of boaties.

1/ Those that have already left the bungs out.

2/ Those that are yet to do it.

[dazza]

have had a few good laughs at boat ramps and don't feel guilty about it, because I have provided plenty of entertainment over the years.

all the usuals like leaving bungs out and falling arse over etc.
my best was

i had an old suzuki sierra soft top, it had a bit of a dicky clutch. to get the tinney out of the water you had to give it a few revs, drop the clutch and hang on . all good except one day forgot to put it in first gear, still had it in reverse . lets just say the little suzi went pretty well as a submarine

the woman holding the boat next to us, (once she got over the initial shock of some lunatic reversing down the ramp) nearly split herself laughing. i can still remember her eyes bulging out of her head

fortunatley once in forward gear, out she came 8) 8)
at the top of the ramp i was greeted by my deckie who was also in hysterics.
to this day i still have a chuckle at my little mishap
cheers
dazza

[Fishin_Dan]

Funniest thing I've ever heard of was my younger brother taking his parents out for a nice relaxing day in his ski boat. He reversed the boat in (Dad was in the water guiding him, Mum was in the passenger seat), when Mum noticed a mentally handicapped person walking up to her window waving at them. Brother wound the window down, and the guy was making noises and waving at the boat. Brother said "Thanks buddy, it is a nice boat, yes" and continued reversing.

A minute later brother hears a yell from Dad "Drive forward, Drive forward!". He drives forward, and water rushes out the back of the boat! He hadn't put the bungs in, and the transom went under water as water rushed in! The handicapped guy knew it and just stood there smiling as my bro had to deal with a very soggy boat!

[seqfisho]

Why does the TV show Funniest Home Vidoes get such good ratings???????????

Boat Ramps are no different, nor are the people who watch the proceedings.

I know Ive done it, been the one laughing and the one laughed at, its all part of life and we should treat it as such.

But I'll never forget the morning at a ramp in Botany Bay as one of our ethnic cousins was launching his old glass rig and had the bow line in his hand ( a dressing gown cord, I kid u not and only about 4 ft long) push the boat off the trailer and it took off so quick he couldnt stop it, but there was no way he was gunna let go so a 5 oclock swim was the order of the day fully dressed gumboots n all in the middle of winter, he kept hold of that cord and finally dragged himself onto the bow as he drifted downstream, only to call out for someone to help bring him back in cause the boat battery was also the car battery and he was by himself..........I still get a good laugh from that, luckily he was dragged back to the ramp so he could move his car and trailer off the ramp and continue his day

Mustve been keen cause he wouldve been freezing , it wouldve been enough to send me home for the day and count myself lucky that it was the worst that could happen and not push my luck any further.

regards Glen

[Razza]

I can give you all a laugh, though it didnt seem too funny at the time
My younger brother and myself had been out off the Gold Coast fishing all day, Good day too plenty of fish great weather
Got back to boat ramp just after dark ,pulled boat out,parked about ten meters from top of ramp to secure boat and give it a general cleanout.
Tow vehicle was younger brothers work ute Hz one tonner loaded with cans of paint.
Well ute was warming up in park with hand brake on when two little thieves decided to see what they could pinch from inside the ute and accidentaly knocked it out of gear .
Hand brake wasnt too crash hot so boat and ute started rolling back towards ramp with us two trying to stop it
Story ends with boat and ute in the water with boat being the only thing stopping the ute from going off the three metre drop at the end of ramp, 100 cans of paint floating round marina.
Had to get tow truck to pull us out and take a dip to connect tow rope to front of ute,Two blokes in a row boat paddling around the marina collecting paint cans.
Two days to dry out ute, 2 new headlights and a new battery and it was traded in 4 days later.
Razza

[getwet]

heres a beauty
bragging to mate while taking the tiedowns off the boat and trailer in the rigging lane, about the cheap new power winch i had just fitted to the trailer. i get in the ute to line her up on the ramp as i take off i hear all this comotion.so i stopthe ute and look in the mirror and the boat is laying on the road.(hadn't tighteded the clutch up on the winch) three guys are cleaning a haul of jack right next to me and all are pissing themselves.very embarrised i get out to inspect the damage. not so bad just a little gel coat off the arse. any way use the
winch to get the boat back on the trailer with a bit of helpful advice from the jack catchers, put her in the water and have a great day out.
i must have looked so stupid to my mate. but he never said any thing.

cheers mal

[Jeremy87]

apart from forgetting the bungs the dumbest thing i've done at a boat ramp was when i was cleaning some fish. Had just caught a bunch of table sized flat head (50-60cms). we were chucking them straight into the ice box as we went (the last fish was caught about a half hour prior). Anyway had left them just on the edge of the water when i had just begun to scale one when the most recently caught fish flipps into the water and slowly begins to swim off. I jump into the water trying to catch it with my hands but it was to slippery and got away. The old man got a good kick out of that one.

[NEWBY]

I will appologise to the thought police and politically correct now but I AGREE WITH Slugo. It is a laugh and when I used to F*#K things up every time I went to put my boat in, I am sure there were many laughing at me too. It is human nature to laugh at the misfortunes of others. How many Michael Jackson jokes do we all laugh about. How many text messages have you had with Tsunami jokes?. Well I have had plenty of all of them and had a giggle. Ease up on the old Slugo and have a laugh at life.

[flattymattyb]

Hi all,

My best so far was not at the boat ramp but still funny. I was pumping yabbies one friday arvo, boat was pulled up on the bank and I was merrily pumping away when out of the corner of my eye I see a boat floating down the channel then it clicked thats my boat and the light easterly was blowing it further away so of with all the winter woolies (yes 4:30pm on a july arvo brrr) and in i go when I got in the boat noticed all the guys sitting on the jetty 200m away pi**ing themselves.

Another good spot to take an esky and have a few laughs is the entrance/exit to main beach on straddie late afternoon on crissie holidays, give those that don't make it a big cheer then head down and giv'em a hand to dig out hours of fun and a good way to learn how to get off a beach properly. .

Cheers
Matty

[GrahamW]

This is too good a thread for me not to add my few boating (including Trailer) stuff ups...

1) Holding up a busy single lane ramp on the Gold Coast as my buddy & I pushed & pushed the boat for several minutes to no effect before a passing boat pointed out we seemed to still have the boat manacled to the trailer by a chain & padlock at the blunt end that we had forgotten & couldn't see from the other end... ...
2) Off ramp launching at Maroon Dam & then driving the trailer over an unseen stump, bending the axle. Managed to drive 90 of the 100 kms home before the uneven wear on one tyre burnt through the rubber & blew the tube. Left sitting in the boat on the side of the road whilst the family went home & I waited for the tow truck - I then lost count of the helpful wags driving past who wanted to know if I had caught anything there...
3) Fishing on my own trolling with 2 rods on Lake Gregory using electric when first rod goes off with nice bass on, as I was holding this the second rod goes off & also goes over the side... can't bear to lose favourite (& most expensive outfit) so throw rod 1 into well of boat & leap overboard after rod 2... feels great to grab on to it until I bob to the surface & watch my boat continue off into the distance on autopilot...
4) Relying on bearing buddies to look after bearing condition & again launching off ramp at Maroon when I wonder why the trailer is making a bit of noise when my buddy points out the wheel on his side has dropped off (more towing & repair expense). This was a good day for my tow truck driver at Maroon. As he was about to look after me a jet-ski rider from across the opposite side came over to beg for help as in trying to do some clever bank side launching of his own he had seen his combi van slide back & go submersible into the dam.

BUT at least I am still in the boat owning club who have not yet left the bungs out !

Graham

[gunna]

GrahamW - had to chuckle at the mental picture of no. 3 .

It is nice to see some get their come-uppence. Bloke unloads his ski boat diagonally across the three lane ramp, then proceeds to have a chat with some fellas nearby. All the boaties are lined up waiting and grumbling - but being patient. Local rescue association has sausage sizzle going so there is another bunch of blokes watching and grumbling about this bloke's poor attitude. This fella knows everyone is getting the shits so very slowly clears the ramp just to annoy people even more. Climbs into the boat and floors the power away from the ramp - HUGE takeoff in the 4knot zone just as Waterways comes round the point. Blue flashing light on Waterways boat and the bloke is pulled over. You could have heard the roar and the cheers a mile away from all the onlookers at the ramp.

[devocean]

Look if any of you guys have seen me reverse you would absolutely crack up.

[Mick]

Crack up devo? More like hide in shame! Just kiddin mate.