Aluminium Handled Gaff Found.

[Dirtysanchez]

I was looking at the pics on the tele and thought it was just a cigar smoking Shark, but alas, I was wrong

[djdamo]

Your all Wrong its mine...

i was fishing on some weed banks about 7-8meters of water when BAM my line starting running! i grabbed the rod and starting realing this monster in, about 30 minutes later and 2 very sore arms it surfaced and yes! a 10 cm diver whiting, i grabed the gaff and i hooked it right in the head ZOOOOM! off when the whiting at 100kms a hour and thats how i lost my gaff :'[


Cheers

Damo

[madmix]

Ah fank u for fining my gaffy,
Mee an Charwee be lining long time for soup wiff fins,
mine you wee in interrational water, no breakee ausee rules.
But wan big bugeree escape an swim wike Ian Forpe towards orstralia.
Mee an charwee chase him for long time but then Navee tell us go home.

So plees you sen him quickwy to Mee an Charwee in Pardu, cos we is
not much soup left.

[blackjack]

i think you guys all need to read slyman's "Depth Guage for Bull Shit" if you haven't already seen it. highly recommended. blackjenny.
ps thanks for the laugh
__________________________________________________ __________


I have decided to come up with a DEPTH GAUGE to assist those wishing to determine the depth of the bullshit being bantered about. This gauge would not only be useful here in the chatrooms, but could be applied to everyday life situations.

Depth is indicated by the BS FACTOR on a scale of 0 - 6.

BS 0 - Atmospheric. Indicates a situation where no bullshit has been brought up but the potential for it to occur is high. You may recognise it when you suspect something doesn't quite smell right, otherwise known as the faint odour of bullshit.

BS 1 - Ankle Deep. Indicates a situation where a person has decided to partake in bullshit. The bullshitter comes up with his story and puts it out there to be kicked around. This is considered a normal level of bullshit for everyday situations, usually done to impress others to create a sense of belonging to a group, which as previously mentioned, is a natural and primeval human need.

BS 2 - Knee Deep. Indicates a situation whereby the bullshitter has identified a person, or persons, willing to accept a higher degree of bullshit for reasons of personal entertainment or otherwise, and the bullshitter is happy to be encouraged by such persons to continue his diatribe.

BS 3 - Waist Deep. Indicates a situation where the bullshitter has been encouraged to a degree where they are now well and truely wallowing in their own bullshit, and loving it. Persons encouraged to the level of BS 3 are usually quite gregarious persons, who get invited to many social functions such as BBQ's and are fed free alcohol, with the intent to get the laughs flowing and the party started.

BS 4 - Armpit Deep. Indicates a situation where the bullshitter has been encouraged to a degree that their stories are now extremely improbable. They are also probably quite inebriated. By now, the only other persons around listening in are also quite inebriated and are unable to identify the degree of bullshit being discussed. Either that or they are waiting for the Critical Mass Situation where the bullshitter may be unable to reign the story in and make a fool of himself.

BS 5 - Chin Deep. This is the Critical Mass Situation. The bullshitter has now reached the maximum amount of all possible bullshit. Having entertained those around them, they must now come up with a witty remark to extract themselves from the situation, and slyly indicate that they are a master bullshitter. It's Do or Die at this moment. Highly experienced bullshitters are capable of saving face at the very last minute, others are not so lucky and bite the proverbial bulldust.

BS 6 - Over Their Head. This indicates a situation where the bullshitter has either failed to identify the Critical Mass Situation, or has failed to come up with the witty extraction comment, they are now literally eating their own bullshit and/or have bullshit on their face. Persons attaining BS 6 are open to ridicule from all others present.

N.B. Bullshitting is an artform that can be performed by all and sundry, however great care must be taken in the depths that you reach. Those wishing to wade through depths of Knee Deep or greater (BS 2 and above), should note that at these depths Bullshit Sharks (Bullies) are known to patrol, looking for inexperienced bullshitters to sink their teeth into, with the aim of progressing them quickly to BS 5 in the hope that they cant cope and move on to BS 6. Bullshit sharks are frequently encountered during periods of low light (ie bbq's at sundown).
simon