Just for a laugh for harrya

[jaybee]

Oldies but Goodies:

Answer phone message "....If you want to buy marijuana, press the hash key...."

A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet.
"My dog's cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him? "
"Well," says the vet, "let's have a look at him."
So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then checks his teeth.
Finally, he says "I'm going to have to put him down."
"What? Because he's cross-eyed? "
"No, because he's really heavy."

A man came round in hospital after a serious accident. He shouted,
"Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!" The doctor replied, "I know
you
can't,
I've cut your arms off".

[SHANE]

Goin' Fishin
A young guy from Texas moves to California and goes to a big mega-department store looking for a job.

The manager says,
Do you have any sales experience?
The kid says, Yeah,
I was a salesman back home in Texas.

Well, the boss liked the kid so he gave him the job.
You can start tomorrow. I'll come down
after we close and see how you did.

His first day on the job was rough,
but he got through it.
After the store was locked up,
the boss came down.

How many sales did you make today?
the boss asked.

The kid says, One.

The boss says, Just one?
Our sales people average 20 to 30 sales a day.

How much was the sale for?

The kid says, $101,237.64.

The boss says, $101,237.64?
What the hell did you sell ?

The kid says, First I sold him a small fish hook.
Then I sold him a medium fish hook.
Then I sold him a larger fish hook.
Then I sold him a new fishing rod.
Then I asked him where he was going fishing and he said down the coast, so I told him he was going to need a boat, so we went down to the boat department and I sold him that twin engine Chris Craft.
Then he said he didn't think his Honda Civic would pull it, so I took him down to the automotive department and sold him that 4 x 4 Blazer.

The boss said, A guy came in here to buy a fish hook and you sold him a boat and truck?

The kid says, No, he came in here to buy a box of tampons for his wife and I said, Well, your weekend's shot -- you might as well go fishing.




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